I have just completed directing my 16th Vacation Bible School. It was a success. Lots of children running, laughing, and learning about God and faith. I have to officially say, it was my last one.
My boss said, I am going out on a good one. Thanks, Boss!
As seems to be the norm over the last few years, when I work with large groups of children, I catch something. Now, yes, I do wash my hands, frequently! I do use hand sanitizer, as well. The question is how to keep from getting what is contagious from the little darlings? In my case, this time, I was run down and exhausted going in to the week. So I was just ripe for the catching of some wayward germ. What was it you ask, the dreaded strep throat! Plus my own sinus infection. A double whammy that sent me to the doctor after one day of fever. I know my symptoms for s.i. I have never had strep and never want it again.
Why is it that parents send their children to large group events when they are coming down with something. Please, you all know when your child isn't their usual delightful self. I had one parent ( a worker) lay his son down in the last row of seats in the worship center with a fever. Yes it was the last day and the last hour. But this kid had to have been feeling poorly before they left the house that morning. Are parents so anxious to be rid of their kids for the morning that they will inflict whatever contagious germs they have upon the rest of us? In this case I got sick as well as my granddaughter. We both came down with it at about the same time. Naturally, I think we were exposed at the same place.
Moms and Dads do the rest of the parents and kids a favor; a kindness really, keep your kids home when they are showing signs of illness. They might be crankier than usual, green or yellow snot is a sure sign. If they have allergies, their snot won't have color. They may be sleepier than usual or had a rough night the night before. Perhaps their appetite isn't what it normally is. You know what is normal. Be loving and kind to the world and keep them home!
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Friday, June 24, 2011
Where Have I Been
As it happens when you become empty-nesters, we've been off doing some interesting stuff! My hubby and I have been participating in Leukemia, Lymphoma's Team in Training. I did two 1/2 marathons and my husband did 2 halves and 1 full marathong this Spring season. Raising money to help find a cancer cure is one of our many interests.
The second thing that has happened this spring was the birth of our first grandson. Wow, what a joy! Four grandkids now, that is a real blessing. Let me tell you about this grandson. He is almost an exact duplicate of his daddy. I say almost, because he isn't quite as chubby as his daddy was.
As I was holding my grandson in my arms today looking down at him, how blessed to see my son so much a part of him. I relived the days when my youngest son was that age. What joy!
Moms and Dads, don't waste a moment of your childs childhood. It seems like a blink of an eye and they are gone. There is plenty of time to do those things that interest you. I am not saying to ignore yours own needs, but, when you have interests that take you away too often or work keeps you away from home, time to re-evaluate.
Some of the things that I notice happening in recent years is the over-scheduling of kids activities. Music lessons, art lesson, ballet, soccer, all before they even start school. What ever happened to learning to play outside and using your imagination? What about playing tea party with Mom or shooting hoops with Dad. How about reversing that? Moms and Dads, please take quality and quantity time with your kids. Don't miss out!
Back to my grandkids...Papa and I have the priviledge of having tea parties with our "nietas" (granddaughters); casting practice in the backyard getting ready for some fishing. We make the time for them at least one day a week. An now we have their brother. Very soon he'll be joining in tea parties and practicing his casting too.
We did it all boy style before, now it is a good mix of girls and boy. Who knows, maybe we will say girls and boyS one day.
The second thing that has happened this spring was the birth of our first grandson. Wow, what a joy! Four grandkids now, that is a real blessing. Let me tell you about this grandson. He is almost an exact duplicate of his daddy. I say almost, because he isn't quite as chubby as his daddy was.
As I was holding my grandson in my arms today looking down at him, how blessed to see my son so much a part of him. I relived the days when my youngest son was that age. What joy!
Moms and Dads, don't waste a moment of your childs childhood. It seems like a blink of an eye and they are gone. There is plenty of time to do those things that interest you. I am not saying to ignore yours own needs, but, when you have interests that take you away too often or work keeps you away from home, time to re-evaluate.
Some of the things that I notice happening in recent years is the over-scheduling of kids activities. Music lessons, art lesson, ballet, soccer, all before they even start school. What ever happened to learning to play outside and using your imagination? What about playing tea party with Mom or shooting hoops with Dad. How about reversing that? Moms and Dads, please take quality and quantity time with your kids. Don't miss out!
Back to my grandkids...Papa and I have the priviledge of having tea parties with our "nietas" (granddaughters); casting practice in the backyard getting ready for some fishing. We make the time for them at least one day a week. An now we have their brother. Very soon he'll be joining in tea parties and practicing his casting too.
We did it all boy style before, now it is a good mix of girls and boy. Who knows, maybe we will say girls and boyS one day.
Sunday, March 6, 2011
Are you happy?
Have you ever heard people say, "You just don't make me happy?" Happiness is a temporary emotion just like sadness. What you should try to srtive for is joy. Personally, I have a very joyful life, because of my relationship with God. No matter what is going on in my life, good or bad. I have joy!
It is so unfair for us to place our happiness on someone else's shoulders. What a burden for them! They will fail every time. Oh, to live with joy. When those sad moments come upon us, they will soon be gone, because they are temporary. But, there waiting is our joy. Stop and focus on your joy. If you live your life in fear, it is impossible to attain joy. Dr. Darryl Delhouse says, "Joy is the absence of fear."
Teach your children how to find joy. Help them to see the positive things in life. If you put your happiness in people, things, status, etc. I'm sorry you will be disappointed. No way around it!
Take time to reflect on what is important; your family and freinds. Nurture your relationships and just think, you have joy in your heart. You will have a happy day!
It is so unfair for us to place our happiness on someone else's shoulders. What a burden for them! They will fail every time. Oh, to live with joy. When those sad moments come upon us, they will soon be gone, because they are temporary. But, there waiting is our joy. Stop and focus on your joy. If you live your life in fear, it is impossible to attain joy. Dr. Darryl Delhouse says, "Joy is the absence of fear."
Teach your children how to find joy. Help them to see the positive things in life. If you put your happiness in people, things, status, etc. I'm sorry you will be disappointed. No way around it!
Take time to reflect on what is important; your family and freinds. Nurture your relationships and just think, you have joy in your heart. You will have a happy day!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Who is the Parent, Anyway?
I had the opportunity to take my granddaughter shopping for some new school shoes today. In my mind this year is a big deal. She starts kindergarten. I'm losing my little buddy to 5 days a week of school. Good for her! Poor old Nanie! Ok, woe is me time is over.
I had forgotten how painful shopping for school clothes with kids really is. Why does a 5 year old have such strong opinions about what would work for school/play? I have noticed how many fairly young children make their own choices about how they dress. Ok, at the age of 10 or maybe even 8 that seems fine; as long as they have been taught a few things. But, 3, 4, 5 and so on, I don't think so.
I believe in allowing children to make a choice. Parents, select two appropriate outfits, and give them a choice. If they don't like their choice, so be it, those are their choices. There doesn't have to be any fighting about this. If whining and crying begin, all you need to say is these are your choices. Stand your ground! Let them bully you into having their way at that young age and you have set yourself to be bullied until they leave home. Who is the parent anyway?
This tact worked well with my children. The older they got the more freedom they earned to make those choices. We always tried to teach about what was appropriate for different occasions. Our biggest battle with one son was that darned hat. A staple in his wardrobe even today. But, he knew when he should take it off. He could always put it back on later. We went through long hair, green hair, bowl cut, mullet with those two guys. Afterall, as teenagers, it was an expression of themselves. They were pretty good kids, so what if their hair was long or green. Yes, we did cringe and ask why. But, they have grown into wonderful men, sons, husbands, and dads. My making their clothing choices for them from birth until 8 years or so didn't ruin them as people.
So, stand firm and keep on lovin'!
Madre
I had forgotten how painful shopping for school clothes with kids really is. Why does a 5 year old have such strong opinions about what would work for school/play? I have noticed how many fairly young children make their own choices about how they dress. Ok, at the age of 10 or maybe even 8 that seems fine; as long as they have been taught a few things. But, 3, 4, 5 and so on, I don't think so.
I believe in allowing children to make a choice. Parents, select two appropriate outfits, and give them a choice. If they don't like their choice, so be it, those are their choices. There doesn't have to be any fighting about this. If whining and crying begin, all you need to say is these are your choices. Stand your ground! Let them bully you into having their way at that young age and you have set yourself to be bullied until they leave home. Who is the parent anyway?
This tact worked well with my children. The older they got the more freedom they earned to make those choices. We always tried to teach about what was appropriate for different occasions. Our biggest battle with one son was that darned hat. A staple in his wardrobe even today. But, he knew when he should take it off. He could always put it back on later. We went through long hair, green hair, bowl cut, mullet with those two guys. Afterall, as teenagers, it was an expression of themselves. They were pretty good kids, so what if their hair was long or green. Yes, we did cringe and ask why. But, they have grown into wonderful men, sons, husbands, and dads. My making their clothing choices for them from birth until 8 years or so didn't ruin them as people.
So, stand firm and keep on lovin'!
Madre
Monday, July 5, 2010
The Family Dinner Table
Tonight we spent the evening sitting at our local beach with a small group of folks from our church for a little bring your own supper-fellowship time. It was a good time for all!
It reminded me of how important the family meal time is. Most families are super busy, to say the least. I would encourage you, beg you even, to have at least one meal a day, as a family, with all members present together at the dinner table. We worked so hard to accomplish this. With dad's crazy works schedule, the sports seasons, overnighters, etc., we managed to do this almost every night. We made it a priority. The number one rule was: NO TELEVISION! Number two rule: NO PHONE CALLS! We had an answering machine. The caller could wait.
Around our table no subject was off limits. Which was very interesting for me, being the lone female. There were evenings that our sons would just stay and talk. We laughed a lot, had some serious discussions, and answered some awkward questions. The things that rarely happened were silence and the inhaling of food and a quick departure from the table. No one seemed too anxious to leave.
We had to adjust meal times to earlier or later depending on ball games etc, sometimes. Dad quite often worked long days during busy seasons and would come home and eat with us and then go back to work. If dinner seems impossible, then start breakfast early. I have a friend that got her family in the routine of eating breakfast at 6am just so they could have one meal a day together. There were lots of complaints in the beginning, but they eventually got used to it. What was important, was their commitment to see each other across the table. I think mayber her kids became young coffee drinkers just to wake up!
We have great memories of things shared. We get together with now our kids, their wives, and our grandkids as often as we are able. The grandkids like to hear stories about their dads. Plus, those are fun to tell. Hopefully, they are doing the same for their families.
Whatever the circumstances in your family, try your hardest to have a family meal together everyday. If that doesn't work, 3 times a week. Follow the two rules, NO TV and absolutely NO CELL PHONES!
Keep on lovin'
Madre
It reminded me of how important the family meal time is. Most families are super busy, to say the least. I would encourage you, beg you even, to have at least one meal a day, as a family, with all members present together at the dinner table. We worked so hard to accomplish this. With dad's crazy works schedule, the sports seasons, overnighters, etc., we managed to do this almost every night. We made it a priority. The number one rule was: NO TELEVISION! Number two rule: NO PHONE CALLS! We had an answering machine. The caller could wait.
Around our table no subject was off limits. Which was very interesting for me, being the lone female. There were evenings that our sons would just stay and talk. We laughed a lot, had some serious discussions, and answered some awkward questions. The things that rarely happened were silence and the inhaling of food and a quick departure from the table. No one seemed too anxious to leave.
We had to adjust meal times to earlier or later depending on ball games etc, sometimes. Dad quite often worked long days during busy seasons and would come home and eat with us and then go back to work. If dinner seems impossible, then start breakfast early. I have a friend that got her family in the routine of eating breakfast at 6am just so they could have one meal a day together. There were lots of complaints in the beginning, but they eventually got used to it. What was important, was their commitment to see each other across the table. I think mayber her kids became young coffee drinkers just to wake up!
We have great memories of things shared. We get together with now our kids, their wives, and our grandkids as often as we are able. The grandkids like to hear stories about their dads. Plus, those are fun to tell. Hopefully, they are doing the same for their families.
Whatever the circumstances in your family, try your hardest to have a family meal together everyday. If that doesn't work, 3 times a week. Follow the two rules, NO TV and absolutely NO CELL PHONES!
Keep on lovin'
Madre
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Who Gets the Last Word
As tempting as it may be, trying to get the last word is a waste of time! Pre-teens/teens are a different type of person to deal with. Sometimes I wondered if they were even human. I had one who argued over everything and one child who was just quiet and sullen. A child with an in between temperment would have been desirable, but that is not how it worked.
Trying to get something out of a child who doesn't want to talk is just about impossible. I found that the best way was to catch him after school. Give him something to eat and sit down and have a chat right then and there. Mini chats were the only way to get info out of that kid. He's a 27 year old family man now. He is still a fairly quiet guy. But, I think I get him. No worries there!
Then there is the arguing child. Uggg! This is where the battle of the last word would take place. When I finally realized that I wouldn't win that battle, I just walked away. He would keep on talking, but I wasn't listening. No point in giving in to that type of exchange. It would lead to frustration and anger. I just refused to play his game.
What I found were moments in the car, dinner time, and mini conversations to convey what needed to be conveyed to the akward teen.
One goal was to eat dinner at the dining table, no television on or even in the room, all together. We had one rule. There were no off limit topics. The kids could bring up anything. Yes, it could be uncomfortable at times, but mostly we had great conversations and cleared up lots of topics.
My kids are great! We had good times and bad times. But mostly we got through those tough teen years in one piece. We have some fond memories as a family. I hope that they learned how to treat their kids during that akward period of life. They'll have a bit more to figure out because they have girls.
Enjoy those kids!
Trying to get something out of a child who doesn't want to talk is just about impossible. I found that the best way was to catch him after school. Give him something to eat and sit down and have a chat right then and there. Mini chats were the only way to get info out of that kid. He's a 27 year old family man now. He is still a fairly quiet guy. But, I think I get him. No worries there!
Then there is the arguing child. Uggg! This is where the battle of the last word would take place. When I finally realized that I wouldn't win that battle, I just walked away. He would keep on talking, but I wasn't listening. No point in giving in to that type of exchange. It would lead to frustration and anger. I just refused to play his game.
What I found were moments in the car, dinner time, and mini conversations to convey what needed to be conveyed to the akward teen.
One goal was to eat dinner at the dining table, no television on or even in the room, all together. We had one rule. There were no off limit topics. The kids could bring up anything. Yes, it could be uncomfortable at times, but mostly we had great conversations and cleared up lots of topics.
My kids are great! We had good times and bad times. But mostly we got through those tough teen years in one piece. We have some fond memories as a family. I hope that they learned how to treat their kids during that akward period of life. They'll have a bit more to figure out because they have girls.
Enjoy those kids!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Best Thing for Your Kids Part 2
I was talking about finding your joy. Once you realize your joy, then you'll need to do your children a favor. That would be to take time to nurture your marriage. If you are a responsible owner of a car, you take it in for proper maintenance. You keep it clean, get the oil changed, do the 30,000 mile check. You get the drift. Why wouldn't you do the same maintenance with your marriage?
When you have children it is too easy to get caught up in them and forget about each other. Fatigue usually takes over and then there is no time for each other. Hire a babysitter, ask the grandparents, or trade child care with friends, but get out together without those kids. Forget the movie date. Go to dinner. A nice place that doesn't make you rush so you can talk, talk, and talk some more. The baby will be ok. The kids will survive. They will leave home one day and you will want to make sure you have invested the time in each other so that nothing has been lost in your relationship.
At least one weekend a year needs to be devoted to the two of you and NO KIDS. Call it the marriage tune up. Your children will thank you for it and get used to it. Our boys used to ask us when we were going on our next date. I explained to them that Mommy and Daddy love each other and that one day they would leave home and it would be just Mommy and Daddy alone again. It was important for them to know that we would always love each other, like each other. We were setting an example for our children.
We have been married for 35 years. Our children are 30 and 27. We have such a great time together now, it is like it was before we had children. That didn't come without work. We made time for each other every week. If an evening date didn't work, then it was a breakfast date or lunch date. NO KIDS!
We gave our kids almost all of our time. What was left we gave to each other. It was worth every minute.
When you have children it is too easy to get caught up in them and forget about each other. Fatigue usually takes over and then there is no time for each other. Hire a babysitter, ask the grandparents, or trade child care with friends, but get out together without those kids. Forget the movie date. Go to dinner. A nice place that doesn't make you rush so you can talk, talk, and talk some more. The baby will be ok. The kids will survive. They will leave home one day and you will want to make sure you have invested the time in each other so that nothing has been lost in your relationship.
At least one weekend a year needs to be devoted to the two of you and NO KIDS. Call it the marriage tune up. Your children will thank you for it and get used to it. Our boys used to ask us when we were going on our next date. I explained to them that Mommy and Daddy love each other and that one day they would leave home and it would be just Mommy and Daddy alone again. It was important for them to know that we would always love each other, like each other. We were setting an example for our children.
We have been married for 35 years. Our children are 30 and 27. We have such a great time together now, it is like it was before we had children. That didn't come without work. We made time for each other every week. If an evening date didn't work, then it was a breakfast date or lunch date. NO KIDS!
We gave our kids almost all of our time. What was left we gave to each other. It was worth every minute.
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